Me and Mr Jones
by Fezzes-Deerstalkers-RedScarves
Summary: (Takes place before Children of Earth. In fact, it ignores it completely.) Ianto's cousin is getting married, and his mother is desperate for Ianto to marry a nice girl. Jack decides to be a supportive boyfriend by inviting himself along. Titles of all chapters are taken from 70's-80's songs.
1. Tell Me Why I Don't Like Mondays

Captain Jack Harkness opened his eyes, breathing in the scent of his boyfriend's hair. _He's been using my shampoo again, _he thought with a smirk. Ianto was deliciously naked, his back pressed firmly against Jack's chest and stomach. Jack pressed a kiss to his boyfriend's cheek. _Boyfriend. _He loved being able to call him that. It felt so right.

They had finally decided a couple of days previously, that their relationship was more than shag every now and again. It was serious. Even Jack thought so. The first day, Jack had referred to Ianto as his boyfriend so many times, just so he could say it. And now, they were lying in bed with each other in their flat

He felt Ianto stir, and glanced down. "Morning, baby," he said to him gently. Ianto just let out an unintelligible murmur, and Jack grinned. Despite what he had thought before they started sleeping together, Ianto Jones was not a morning person. Particuarly not a Monday morning person. Jack leaned over him and pressed a kiss to his lips briefly. Ianto gave a chuckle, reaching up to run his thumb over Jack's cheek.

"I dreamt about you last night," Ianto said softly, raising head to give him a chaste kiss. With his cheeks still flushed from sleep, and his hair sticking up at awkward angles, he looked adorable. Jack would've laughed if he hadn't been in such a good mood.

"Oh, really?"

"Mm…You met my mam…she liked you."

"Interesting…" Jack grinned, "You think she'd like me in real life?"

Ianto shrugged, beginning to card his fingers through Jack's hair. "I've told you. My Mam's…you know…against anything that she doesn't think God intended."

The older man smiled sadly, but kissed him, this time not letting go.

#*#*#

Ianto worked the Hub coffee machine, setting freshly brewed coffee aside. Jack grabbed a cup, tapping the Welshman on his bum playfully. He smirked over his cup as Ianto rolled his eyes, and pecked him on the cheek, nestling into his neck. Jack set down his coffee as his lover began to kiss his exposed skin. He rested his hands on Ianto's hips, swaying slightly.

They were interrupted by Ianto's phone rang. He groaned softly, reaching into his pockets to retrieve it. Upon seeing the caller ID, he groaned louder. "It's my mam. Hold on a sec."

He stepped away, leaving the room just as Owen entered. "Well…" The Englishman began, "He didn't look happy. Who's he on the phone with?"

"His mother. Excuse me; this is something I want to listen to."

Jack followed Ianto, standing just outside the door.

"…Yes, mam, I know Anwen's getting married…No, I dot need you to set me up with her friend…Do I _have_ to go...I understand that…yes, I do think marriage should be celebrated…A week? I'm not sure if I can get that much time off…Yeah but it'll all go to sh-…no, of course I didn't almost swear…"

Jack walked into the room, wrapping his arms around Ianto, who leant his head back, closing his eyes.

"Mam...Alright…okay, I'll go…I don't know if I'm bringing anyone, mam…"

Jack smirked. "You could always bring me."

"That was my friend Jack, mam- wait, just a sec," Ianto frowned, taking his phone away from his ear.

"Who's Anwen?"

"My cousin. She's-"

"Getting married. Yeah."

Ianto looked down, "You were listening?"

"Yeah. A week with your family sounds like hell. Want me to tag along?"

Ianto shook his head, "No, Jack. You're needed here."

"The others will cope, I'm sure. Anyway, I want to meet your family."

Ianto smiled, and turned away, starting to speak into the phone again, "Yeah, I'm back…Mam, actually, is it alright if I bring my friend...Alright then. See you in a few weeks. Bye mam."


	2. Highway To Hell

**[A/N- Hi, I just want too thank everyone who reviewed/followed/favourited. I honestly haven't posted anything I ages, so to get that response was extremely encouraging. **

**Onwards!]**

Ianto packed his suitcase neatly in the orderly fashion you would expect from such a man. Jack was surprised to see him pack jeans, and even the odd t-shirt, though he did pack dress slacks and a ridiculous amount of ties. Jack quirked an eyebrow as the younger man buried a box of condoms underneath his clothes, out of sight from anyone who might decide to open it on a whim.

"Planning on getting lucky?" Jack teased him, before jumping onto the bed, making himself comfortable despite his suitcase, which was in the middle of the floor and almost certainly a tripping hazard, only being half packed. If that.

Ianto winced at the crude phrase, before shrugging light-heartedly. "I reckon my cousin could find me a friend. Y'know, when the rest of my family are out of the house."

Laughing a little, Jack nodded, "Oh, I'm sure whoever you sleep with will be absolutely gorgeous, hilariously funny, as well as being a great boss…with a fantastic butt." He heard a mock-scoff.

"Big-headed and a show-off more like."

"Rude." The American pouted theatrically, until Ianto leant over him and kissed him. Jack sighed when he stood and pulled Jack up by his braces.

"C'mon…Once we're done packing we can have some fun."

#*#*#

"You sure you still want to drive, Yan?" Asked Jack as he shut the boot of the car. Ianto stepped out of the apartment building, keys in hand, to join him.

"Yep. You drive like a bloody madman!" He stepped close to Jack, who put his arm around him, "So…while we're at my parent's house we can't act like a couple. At least not in front of them, or my sister and her husband. It's perfectly alright in our bedroom, as long as they don't find out about us. I want to tell them in a few months. From a safe distance. Ideally in Australia, so I don't have to suffer Mam's wrath when she finds out its very unlikely that I'm going to marry the pretty girl she always dreamed I would."

"You've really thought this through," Jack frowned, "How long have you had this in mind?"

"I always considered it to be a possibility"

"Ah, well…at least you've got a pretty boyfriend. So, have you come up with a backstory for me?" Ianto nodded, "I'm impressed. Is it an interesting one?"

"You're an American pilot who immigrated to Wales in because you didn't want to face living near the place you used to live. You stopped working as a pilot, and instead work with me."

"And your job is?"

Ianto shrugged, "They think I'm a receptionist for a law firm. Just say you are too."

"What are their names again?"

"What, of my family?"

"Yeah. What kind of a boyfriend would I be if I didn't know their names?" Jack winked.

"My older sister is Rhiannon, my brother-in-law is Johnny. Just…just call my parents Mr and Mrs Jones."

"Hm, Rhiannon…" Jack considered the names thoughtfully, "Pretty regular names. So. Tell me, Mr Jones, how the hell did you manage to draw the short straw with a name like 'Ianto'?" Jack quipped, touching their foreheads together.

"You seemed to enjoy saying it a lot earlier on when we were having a shower together," Ianto fired back, taking the older man by surprise. Ianto kissed him gently before pulling away. "C'mon, get in the car."

Jack grinned. "What, is that all I get for hauling your bags out here? One kiss?"

The Welshman shook his head at his boyfriend, but his mouth twitched into a smile.

"Just get in the car, Harkness."


	3. American Pie

**[A/N- I honestly cannot explain how wonderful it is to read your reviews, and to see that users have been following and favouriting. Thank you all so, so much!]**

"I swear to god, I am never going on a road trip or anything else with you ever, if you're this bad on a car journey."

A piece of toffee popcorn hit Ianto in the face. "If you're gonna be like that maybe you should've let me drive," Jack said, playfully.

"Oh, really?"

"Uh huh." Jack put his seat back, clutching the bag of popcorn to his chest. "So. How far?"

"A couple of miles left, and then we're there. Can I have some popcorn, please?"

Jack thought about it, eating a piece.

"Uh…nope."

"Please."

"Nope. It's mine. It's all mine!"

#*#*#

When they pulled up outside Ianto's parents house, Jack saw three cars parked near and on the driveway. A little pink 'Princess On Board' sign was hanging in the window of a red Fiat Punto.

"Your sister has a kid?" Jack asked, trying to hide the excited note in his voice.

Ianto looked up from checking his lap wasn't covered in popcorn. "What? Er, yeah, my sister has two, David and Mica…" he undid his seatbelt, "Is that a problem?"

"Nope, I get on well with 'em."

"Good."

They both climbed out of the car, and Jack turned to see the front door open. Two children emerged, running down the gravel driveway, screaming, "Uncle Ianto!"

Kneeling down to their level, Ianto spoke to them, his voice filled with energy. "Hi Mica, hi David! My goodness, you two are nearly as tall as me…" he led them and Jack inside. The hallway was painted a warm grey colour, and framed photographs of Ianto, or of Riannon, or of who Jack could only guess were family members, lined the walls

Jack was too busy watching his boyfriend interact with the two children, who seemed to adore him, that he didn't notice who he assumed was Ianto's mother and sister. He turned, coming face to face with them. The Captain, who had faced more aliens than he could count, suddenly felt a million pterodactyls fly into his stomach, and apparently these ones liked to wear stiletto heels.

"Uh…hi." He looked desperately at Ianto, who straightened up and stepped forward to hug his mother with a greeting. The children jumped about their feet excitedly.

"Mam, Rhiannon, this is my friend-"

"Captain Jack Harkness," Jack interrupted, flashing them both one of the smiles that he knew made Ianto melt. He offered his hand politely to both of them, who both shook it with a smile.

"Ooh, Captain is it? I'm Ianto's mam, as you probably already knew. Lovely to meet one of Ianto's friends from work at last," Smiled Mrs Jones, "I was beginning to think he didn't have any!"

Jack smirked at Ianto, before he looked to Rhiannon as she introduced herself and her kids. Mrs Jones guided the new arrivals upstairs to Ianto's old room, which had been turned into a spare room, with two beds, a chest of drawers and a wardrobe. The apparently once-green walls had been papered with a black and turquoise flower pattern, and one wall had been painted. Ianto showed him the bathroom, and after they had put all their bags in their room, Ianto showed him the downstairs area.

After giving him a tour of the kitchen, the downstairs bathroom and the dining room, Ianto lead him into the living room, where the two kids were happily playing with an old board game. Rhiannon was letting them stay the night at 'Grandma and Grandpa's house', but she and Johnny had gone back to their home.

#*#*#

It was seven o'clock, and just beginning to get dark, when the front door opened and Ianto's father came home from the clinic he worked at. Jack immediately stood from his seat, shaking hands with the aging man, who had Ianto's eyes, and bone structure. Ianto hugged his dad, who told him he'd missed him greatly. The children went to bed not long after, leaving the adults to chat and ask Jack questions.

"So…a Captain?" Mr Jones asked him, a look of interest on his face, "Working as a receptionist?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm- I mean, I _was_ a pilot. I guess I kind of just completely lost interest in the whole idea of flying, y'know?" Jack mentally punched the air. _Nailed it_.

"And you're American? How long have you lived over here?"

"Um…I'll have to get back on that one; it's been more years than I care to remember."

When Ianto's parents turned in for bed, it was half past nine. Ianto turned the sound of the TV down, shut the living room door, and pressed his face against the crook of Jack's neck, letting out a long, low groan. "This is exhausting. I want to kiss you or hug you, but I can't because they're always _there_," he whispered, and Jack kissed him on the head, making a sound of agreement. They lay back together, just cuddling for a while, until Ianto decided he was tired.

They went upstairs and climbed into separate beds. Jack tossed and turned, until finally giving up. Setting an alarm on his phone for six AM so he could wake up and swap beds before anyone came in, Jack climbed into bed beside Ianto. Apparently Jack hadn't been the only one missing their cuddling, as Ianto immediately clung to him like he never wanted to let go.


	4. Wish You Were Here

**[A/N- Thank you all once again! You're all wonderful xx]**

Jack found it ridiculous that Ianto got up at seven am, and he always had, but now it was even more of a curse. He had gotten up and dressed at eight, or thereabout, and he had to make the decision on whether he would go downstairs alone or wait for Ianto to come up. He sat on his bed, and decided he should check up on the Hub.

He dialled Gwen's number, and she picked up on the second ring.

"Hello?" She answered with, and he could hear relief in her voice.

"Hey, Gwen. How are things?" Asked Jack, lying down on his turquoise sheets.

"Everything's fine…a bit of a mess around the place already, but that's down to Owen." Jack heard an unintelligible remark from who Jack could only assume was Owen, and he heard Gwen's laugh. "He says he promises he'll clean up. Anyway, what are Ianto's parents like?"

"Uh, they're alright. Ianto's mother has already tried to set him up."

"Wait…they don't know?" He could hear the confusion in her voice, "What the hell, Jack?!"

"Yan said they're homophobic. I really don't understand you twenty-first century people and your insistence with heterosexual relationships."

Gwen scoffed, "Not all of us have an insistence. Just some of the older people, and a few religious twats. And people who are so narrow-minded they see no wrong in being a twat to anyone that doesn't fit their view of the 'perfect relationship'."

"Huh."

"So…what do you two have to do today?"

"Um…We have to go to a wedding rehearsal at six. More fun family bonding time. Ianto is absolutely dreading it, as you can probably imagine."

The door opened, and Ianto stepped in, shutting the door behind him upon seeing that Jack was on the phone.

"Who are you talking to?" Ianto asked inquisitively, sitting on the bed beside him

Covering the phone, he replied, "Gwen. Ooh, I'll put it on speaker-phone!"

"Is Ianto there?" She asked, and Jack put the phone on the bedspread.

"Yep. Hey, Gwen! How is everything?"

"It's all fine, but you'd probably have a heart-attack if you saw the place. Owen's taken over."

"My dear god." They heard her laugh.

"Anyway, I need to go now. Myfawny needs to be fed. I wish you were here, Ianto."

"Tell her and the other two hi for us," Jack put in, "Bye!"

"See you!"

#*#*#

Jack frowned at his grey waistcoat as he buttoned it up. He tucked the hem of his blue plaid shirt into his fitted dark grey jeans, looking into the full-length mirror next to their wardrobe. He felt Ianto snake his arms around him, from behind, making him smile as the Welshman kissed his cheek and neck.

"Nervous?" He asked Ianto, still checking himself over in the mirror.

He felt Ianto sigh against his neck, "A little. There are going to be loads of women for my mam to set me up with. Or try to."

"Mm. I wonder how many people she'll try and set me up with. She's already talking to me about another one of your cousins. Y'know, Arwen's sister?""

Ianto groaned. "I am so sorry about her, by the way." They heard his mother calling them from downstairs.

"Boys! It's almost time to go! Ianto, what's been taking you so long?"

Ianto sighed yet again. "Speak of the fuckin' devil," he muttered.

Jack laughed, spinning around to capture his lips in a chaste kiss. "Language, Ianto Jones," he said, his voice low.

"Jesus…Jack, don't do that or I'll end up jumping you at the rehearsal dinner."

"That's the plan," Jack smirked, before turning on his tail, and leaving the room.

He heard Ianto curse behind him.


	5. The Way It Is

**[A/N- Thank you all once again!]**

Once they arrived at the venue, they were ushered inside and to their seats. A few people approached Ianto and his family, offering greetings and the like, until everyone was directed to their place. The church was a traditional fourteenth century building, a picturesque centrepiece in the village where Arwen had grown up. Jack had been informed that Arwen's mother was a traditionalist. The woman herself was sat with her sister at in the front pew. Ianto's uncle, his father's brother, stood proudly arm-in-arm with his daughter, the bride-to-be.

She was an attractive brunette, with hair that fell just below her shoulders and a pretty, but by no means stunning, face. As she passed them whilst doing her practice walk down the aisle, she smiled broadly, looking surprised to see Ianto. When she spoke her vows, it was in a soft Welsh accent. Her fiancé, Jonathan, was from England, which had apparently not gone down well with Ianto's Aunt.

"At least he's from the same continent!" Jack had joked when Ianto told him. Ianto only gave him a sad smile.

Once the couple had practiced their vows, and every poem, Bible reading, prayer and hymn had been looked over, the crowd dispersed, and met up again at an expensive-looking restaurant not far out of the village.

A private room had been hired out, with a buffet and a bar, so that the guests could 'mingle'. Jack noticed Mrs Jones pointing him out to her sister-in-law, but he pretended not to notice, instead trying to focus on the champagne that was handed to him by a waiter in a black waistcoat and a perfect, starched white shirt.

The father of the bride stood up from his seat, and made a toast to his daughter's marriage, that wasn't as grand as one would hope.

Nobody approached him on his own, thank his stars, but the five minutes before he and Ianto had left lingered on his memory. He could tell from the way Ianto kept glancing at him, even when they were talking to his cousin, that it was lingering on his memory, too.

Meeting Ianto's gaze, he gave the smallest of smirks that he knew only Ianto would notice. He saw his throat move as he swallowed, looking quickly back to Arwen, who was reminiscing about their childhood. Jack heard him breathe a sigh of relief as she went to talk to Rhiannon and Johnny.

Jack looked him in the eye. "Outside?"

Ianto exhaled through pouted lips, before nodding, "Outside."

#*#*#

After leaving the room as quickly and discreetly as possible, Ianto lead Jack around to the back of the restaurant, where the staff parked their cars. It was dark, and the only light was a flickering streetlamp. As soon as they turned the corner, Jack pressed his mouth firmly against Ianto's, wrapping his arms around his neck. Ianto grunted, pushing him against the rough stone wall.

"Ah…fuck," Jack cursed as his head hit the wall.

"_Language_, Captain Harkness," Ianto taunted, like Jack had earlier. Jack couldn't help but laugh a little, until the sound was swallowed by Ianto's moth and tongue. He tasted like the champagne they had been drinking about twenty minutes previously, sweet and delectable. Jack moaned into his mouth, letting his hands find their way down to Ianto's black-denim clad arse, which had been on his mind for the past few hours. Damn these Jones' and their smart-casual dress-code. Ianto suited almost more than he did a suit.

He heard Ianto sigh gently, felt his eyelashes flutter, smelled his light aftershave.

They were unaware of how long they stood there, unaware of time itself. Unaware that they were no longer alone.

Jack heard a throat clear, felt his face heat up, and opened his eyes to see his boyfriend's brother-in-law with his own eyes wide open.

Ianto pulled away, looking at the floor. There was silence, before he spoke up.

"Look, Johnny-"

"Save it, Ianto," He said, and Jack wasn't sure if he was annoyed or not, "Rhi didn't mention…this." He gestured to them, not meeting their eyes. He put his hands on his hips.

"She…she doesn't know. None of my family does." He looked up shyly, and Johnny ran his hands through his hair.

"Jesus…I am so sorry."

Jack dismissed it with a wave of his hand. "That's fine. It's not the first time something like this has happened with us."

Ianto huffed, "Don't remind me."

Johnny shook his head. "Fucking hell, how long have you been together?"

Jack shrugged. "It's kind of been on and off for about a year and a half, or so."

"I did wonder. I guess I'll, uh, leave you to it."

He was already backing away, but he turned as fast as he could and walked away. Brushing themselves down, Jack and Ianto decided to return inside.


	6. Mr Blue Sky

The family returned home close to midnight, after what felt like hours and hours of schmoozing and talking. Jack had practically been forced into taking the maid-of-honour's phone number, but when he checked his phone and gone to delete it, he found that had already been taken care of. He sent a quick text to each of the team, telling them Ianto and he had just about escaped with their lives.

Hm…In a choice between deadly aliens that could easily shear off your face with one bite, and talking to countless people, some with accents so strong he couldn't understand what they were trying to communicate? Yeah…

Jack would go with aliens every time.

Jack and Ianto traipsed up to their room, while Mr Jones paid the babysitter who was keeping an eye on the kids, who had, again, insisted on staying at their grandparent's house, because, "Jack and Uncle Ianto are more fun than mummy and daddy!"

The former two undressed, before brushing their teeth and collapsing into bed next to each other, Ianto clinging to Jack like a limpet to a rock.

#*#*#

Jack groaned as his six 'o'clock alarm went off next to his head. He sat up and turned it off, only to be tugged down again by Ianto. "Nope!" Ianto exclaimed, lying on top of him.

Laughing, Jack attempted to push him off, but Ianto was insisting on being stubborn.

"No. No. No, you can't change beds." With his accent still heavy from sleep, and his cheeks flushed, Jack gave up on it. He instead wrapped his arms around him.

"Mm…what if someone were to come in?" Jack asked.

"Tough shit," Mumbled Ianto into the pillow, "Now go back to sleep."

"Sleep? Sleep is overrated. I'm not in the mood for sleep."

"I'm not having sex with you while my niece and nephew are asleep two rooms away, if _that's_ what you're in the mood for. I know how loud you are, Harkness."

"Damnit...well, that's my morning plans out the window." Ianto chuckled. "So. What are we going to do until seven? Why are we even getting up at seven? That's, like, way too early."

"We're taking David and Mica off of Rhi's hands. We're going to the zoo, because it's the summer holidays for them and I take them every year."

"Aw, that's adorable."

"Shut your face and let me sleep."

Jack sighed. "So…we can't have sex right now?"

"No. That's a definite no."

"Hm…can we make out?"

"...I suppose that's okay."

#*#*#

Leaving earlyish, so they could avoid traffic, Ianto, Jack, Mica and David were at the zoo at eight thirty, just as the gates opened. The two kids were desperate to see different animals, so they took turns choosing what to see next, crossing off each enclosure on their map as they went.

It was a slightly overcast day, and Ianto was dressed in a casual red and blue plaid shirt, and a pair of worn, faded jeans that Jack wasn't used to seeing him in. He seemed so laid back, his hair mussed and not really styled, but that was mostly Jack's doing.

As David and Mica were walking a little in front, babbling about everything they saw, Jack reached out and clasped Ianto's hand, swinging his arm slightly. He checked Ianto's face, to make sure he wasn't making him uncomfortable, but he read no sighs of discomfort. He pecked his cheek gently, which earned the couple some strange looks, but they pretended not to notice.

Despite having seen weirder creatures in his time, Jack was still in awe of most of the animals in the park, many of which were long extinct in the fifty-first century. He was like a kid again.

They saw giraffes, zebras, rhinos, and a frankly ridiculous amount more. In the aquarium building, there was a sea turtle that was almost one hundred years old ("Hey, Jack, it's nearly as old as you!" Ianto quipped, making the children laugh, because they didn't know how close that was to the truth.), and jellyfish, and insanely coloured fish.

"Whoa!" David exclaimed as he looked at a spiny crab, "It looks like an alien!"

"Don't be silly, David. There's no such thing. Grandma said so," Mica said, officiously

"Yes there is! Right, Uncle Ianto?"

Ianto smiled. "I don't know. Maybe there is. But if they look like _that,_" he gestured to the crab, "Then I don't think I ever want to meet one!"

Jack looked at Ianto and gave him a private smirk.

#*#*#

"I don't know how you do it, Ianto, I really don't," Rhiannon smiled, "Look at them, they're wiped out!"

Shrugging, Ianto placed a sleeping David on their couch, "It was nothing, Rhi. Really."

"Well, they've had such a good time. They really missed you."

"I'm sorry…work keeps me in a lot. I don't get much free time."

Rhiannon smiled at Jack as he brought Mica in, before looking back at Ianto. "You must have a terrible boss, Yan."

"Yeah, he's awful. Absolutely terrible boss. He keeps me up all night. Y'know, with work."

Jack chuckled. "That, he does."

Smiling, Ianto sighed.. "Best be off, then."

Rhiannon reached out and put her hand on his shoulder, gently, "Are you sure?" She asked, "You could always stay for a cuppa, hey?"

Ianto shook his head, "We…appreciate the offer. But we best be off. Mam and Dad aren't home, so we best get as much time to ourselves as we can before tomorrow. Mam wants us to go last-minute shopping with her."

Rhiannon shook her head, rolling her eyes. "You unlucky sods. See you tomorrow, then?" She hugged her brother quickly, before touching Jack lightly on his arm.

"Yeah See you, Rhi."


	7. True

**[A/N- Thank you all once again for reading, reviewing and/or following. It's appreciated a lot!]**

"Ready to go, Jack?"

Ianto was at the door, his mother already out in the car. Jack put his trademark coat on. "Yeah, just a second, Yan." He pocketed his phone, and his wallet. In order to stay in touch with the rest of the team, like they promised they would, Jack kept his earpiece in his pocket and an alert signal in his wallet. Just in case.

He stepped out the front door, following his boyfriend to the car. He got in the backseat, after insisting Mrs Jones took shotgun.

The shopping centre was fifteen minute drive away, and Ianto's voice was strained as he tried to hold a conversation with his mother.

They parked the car on the second floor of a car park block, and walked towards the shops, Jack following behind a little. First of all, they stopped off in a few smaller shops, before looking around a large chain store for other items. Ianto's mother went to the nearby supermarket to pick up some things for dinner that night. She had invited Rhiannon, Johnny and the two children 'round to save them the hassle, and Jack was a little apprehensive. The two children would be overexcited for the wedding the next day, and he wasn't sure if he was going to be able to look Johnny in the eye, due to what the man had seen Ianto and Jack doing just two nights previously.

While Mrs Jones was gone, Jack and Ianto went to a bookshop to pass the time, and just as Ianto turned the corner, Jack caught a glimpse of something outside the shop window.

"Shit," he cursed under his breath, "Ianto?" He said loudly enough for the man in question to hear him, but not loudly enough to draw too much attention.

Ianto must have recognised his authoritative tone, because he was by Jack's side in a second. "Yes, sir?" jack pointed out the window just as a scream sounded not ten feet away from the store.

Jack saw Ianto reach into the pocket of his jacket, and they both ran out to the weevil that was evoking terror from a young woman. People began to run in different directions.

"Everybody stay calm!" Jack called out, "We've got this under control!"

The weevil hissed and turned, lashing out. Ianto sprayed anti-weevil spray at it, taking it by surprise, and leaving Jack just enough time to cuff its hands together, grabbing its boiler suit collar and turning it around. He looked at Ianto. "You keep anti-weevil spray in your jacket?"

Ianto shrugged. "You keep weevil cuffs in your coat."

Jack smiled at his retort, before realising that security were heading their way. He put his COMMS unit in, switching it on.

"Toshiko?"

He got a reply seconds later. "What- Jack? Is something wrong?"

"We had a weevil loose. Don't worry, we handled it. But we need you to pick it up for us."

"Sure, where are you?"

He gave her the name off the shopping centre, pulling the weevil back with a sharp tug as it tried to pull free. Ianto had taken his jacket off to cover its head, but still it struggled.

"Okay, Jack, no problem. Gwen and Owen will meet you outside the main entrance in…five minutes. I'm having their security evacuate everyone within a fifty metre radius of you."

"Thanks, Tosh. You're a star."

"I do my best."

#*#*#

On the car ride back, Mrs Jones didn't stop going on about it. Jack and Ianto feigned ignorance, saying they had been nowhere near, and that it must have been some freak trying to start a conspiracy.

They helped her unpack the shopping, and retired to their room until Rhiannon and her lot arrived.

They sat down and ate the dinner that had been prepared, and listened to Mrs Jones' insistent chatting about how terrifying it had been. Once desert had been eaten, Ianto and Jack volunteered to clear up, to avoid having to hear any more of it. From the kitchen, they could just about hear her incessant talking, and just make out what was being said, but at least they were away from the source.

Ianto started loading everything into the dishwasher, when he heard Mica speak up.

"So…when are Jack and Uncle going to get married?" Ianto froze.

He heard his mother laugh. "Well, I've been trying to get Uncle Ianto to have girlfriend, my dear…but if you ask me, it won't be a while. And as for Jack, well…. I'm sure it won't be too long, though he doesn't seem the type. Good looking fellow isn't he?"

"Uncle Ianto definitely thinks so. I saw him kiss him yesterday, at the zoo we went to. I think they thought I couldn't see. And they were holding hands, as well! It was really sweet."

There was silence and Ianto looked up at Jack, who avoided his gaze, swallowing.

And then Ianto heard his mother's voice in a tone he hadn't been subjected to since he got into a bad fight in Year eight, broken his arm and earned himself two weeks' worth of detention. It was a tone that suggested anger, annoyance, and, worst of all, disappointment.

"Is that so?"


	8. Rebel Yell

**[A/N- Thank you all, once again! I just wanted to say that there is some gay-bashing in the following chapter, but it is in no way my opinion. I'm all for the LGBT community!]**

"God, mam, don't do this!" they heard Rhiannon say, and the door to the kitchen opened. "Mam, stop it! Johnny, take the kids home. Now."

There was a protest from both of the children, but their father did as his wife told him to. Ianto's mother stood in the doorway, her eyes fixed on the two men in front of her.

"Is it true?" Her voice was dangerously quiet, her eyes narrow.

"I…"Ianto started, "I don't know what you-"

"You know exactly what I mean, Ianto Jones."

"Mam…I can explain."

"There's nothing to explain! So, what are you? Gay? Or do you fuck anything that comes your way?"

Jack suddenly understood why Ianto had been so afraid of telling his mother.

"Mam, it's…it's not like that with me and Jack."

"No? My god, what were you thinking, boy!"

"I…I didn't mean for it to happen. But I'm glad it did. I'm so fucking glad it did."

"Why? Are you proud to be a bloody queer?"

Ianto's eyes were flaming, and Jack knew he would snap any moment now. He kept on the side-lines, with his mouth shut.

"If you weren't stuck in the fucking nineteenth century-"

"Ianto Jones!" His father appeared behind his mother, "Don't you dare speak to your mother like that!"

Rolling his eyes, Ianto let out a groan of annoyance. "I'm sorry, dad. But I'm sick to the _death_ of her bigoted remarks, okay? I am in _love_ with Jack."

His mother cut in, "Oh, so its _love_ is it? What do you know about love?"

"I'm old enough to know-"

"Oh, I see how it is. Ianto is so grown up. He knows _everything-_"

Shaking his head, Ianto laughed. "That's not what I said. You know perfectly well that isn't what I said."

She sighed. "Where did I go wrong, Ianto?" Jack's eyes narrowed and he couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"Nowhere," he interrupted, "Ianto is perfect as he is."

"Oh, and you'd know that, would you?" She fixed her cruel gaze on him, "Really, in front of the children, as well!"

"Believe you me, this word is changing. By the fifty-first century, being gay or bisexual, or pansexual, or asexual or whatever will be the last of our worries. Being bigoted is something children are taught."

She stepped closer to him, looking up into his eyes. "What you're doing with my son is godless. It's wrong."

Jack shook his head. "No. I don't want to be on bad terms with you, because I love your son and I'm fairly sure your son loves me-"

"I do."

"He does. Please forgive me, but I'm really not that sorry. We aren't doing anything wrong. And as for godless? I don't believe in any god, but I'm pretty sure if there is or was a god at any point in time, any point in history, anywhere, be it on a distant planet, star, galaxy, or right here on earth then he or she, or they are supposed to love everyone. Isn't that what your bible says?"

He paused, waiting for someone, anyone, to say something. There was simply silence.

"Well…isn't it?" He looked to Ianto for confirmation, but his boyfriend was speechless, his mouth hanging open a little. And then he gave a breathy laugh, stepping forward to wrap his arms around Jack in one smooth movement.

"Come on, love…" Jack heard Mr Jones say to his wife, "We'll deal with it tomorrow."

Jack turned his head just in time to see Rhiannon walk away, but he was pretty sure she was smiling.

#*#*#

Their bedroom door opened at around six-thirty, and Ianto groaned in his sleep. Jack opened his eyes to see his boyfriend's father in the doorway.

"Come on you two. Up," He commanded, but his tone was light.

Ianto groaned again.

"Ianto Jones, get out of bed. Now!"

Jack laughed as Ianto sat up, rubbing his eyes. The door closed, and Ianto stood up, walking over to their chest of drawers to get underwear out.

He looked over his shoulder at the older man. "Stop looking at my arse, Harkness," He teased.

Jack smirked, sitting up. "Oh, but you _like_ it. Can you get me out some boxers? Please. I am the guest after all."

"Yeah, whatever."

The boys dressed, putting on white shirts and black trousers, before going down to breakfast. Mrs Jones regarded them coldly, but she had laid out toast and mugs of tea for them.

"Thanks, mam," Ianto smiled, as best as he could.

She sighed deeply. "What's this about you two sharing a bed? And under my roof, as well!"

Staring into his cup, Ianto exhaled deeply. "Mam…can we not do this. Not today."

"There is a reason you had two beds in that room. Even if it were a girl-"

"We didn't- We didn't _do_ anything"

Jack chuckled. "Unfortunately."

Ianto rolled his eyes. "Jack…really not helping."

"Oh. Right. Sorry, my bad." Jack went back to his toast.

"So, what I want to know…" Ianto's mother trailed off.

"What, Mam?" Ianto asked.

"It's why. Why would you be sharing a _single_ bed if you _weren't _doing anything?"

Ianto took a bite of toast and a gulp of tea as he considered his words carefully. "Well, I…I…"

"Well?"

"I can't really…get to sleep without him being _there_."

Jack tried not to grin ridiculously, he really did. He continued eating his toast, occasionally glancing at his boyfriend.

After breakfast, they fetched their jackets from upstairs, and checked themselves over one last time. In Jack's opinion, Ianto looked gorgeous, but he always thought that.

Once again, pterodactyls swarmed in Jack's stomach, but he smiled at his boyfriend. "Ready, baby?"

Ianto shrugged. "As I'll ever be."


	9. Behind Blue Eyes

**[A/N- Apologies for not posting yesterday, I had to babysit my next door neighbour's kids. I'm afraid this is going to be the penultimate chapter but once again thank you so much for reading/reviewing/favouriting/following!]**

All in all, Jack found the service relatively tedious. As Mrs Jones had said to Mica, he wasn't one for marriage, but having Ianto there made it just about bearable. The bride and groom looked equally pretty, but both were nothing compared to the man sat beside him with his hand on Jack's knee.

The little church was full of people, flowers and pale lilac ribbon, but it emptied quickly after the service. Pictures were taken of the newly wedded couple, of the wedding party, of the decorated cream car outside the church.

Jack felt his phone buzz, and he took it out of his pocket.

"Yeah…hey, Gwen?"

"Jack, we need you!" she exclaimed by way of introduction.

"Wait…what, Gwen we're just about to- hold on a second. Ianto!"

The Welshman turned his head to look at him, his eyes panicked. "What's wrong?"

Jack held a finger up as he listened to Gwen.

"Jack…there's been rift activity spiking up. We really need Tosh back at base, so you need to come in. I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine, I'm sure. Ianto, baby…" He explained the situation and Ianto nodded.

"I'll come with you, Jack."

"No…Ianto, you're needed here."

"They won't miss me. Come on." He slipped his COMMS unit out of his jacket.

#*#*#

As Ianto drove, Jack spoke through his COMMS unit to the team.

"There have been sightings of…a human-type creature. But with green skin and wht appear to be spines. On their faces," Tosh explained, "Any ideas?"

"They sound like Vinvocci," Said Jack, "Relatively peaceful species. Probably lost. I'm sure you can take it from here, but we'll be on standby, don't worry."

"Sure thing."

Ianto changed directions, driving instead towards where the wedding reception was being held. He parked with the rest of the cars in a little car park around the back of the hall, and they got out. Jack shrugged off his greatcoat and threw it onto the backseat before closing the door.

"oh, god…" Ianto muttered, and Jack looked up. "Mam-"

"And just where have you two been?" Asked Mrs Jones.

"I…uh…"

"Ianto forgot something," Jack interrupted, leaning against the car, "Didn't you, sweetheart?" She winced at the term of endearment.

"Uh…yeah. But It's all fine now. Lets, uh, lets go inside."

#*#*#

"Jack. We need you again."

"My _god,_ Owen!" Jack hissed into his COMMS.

"Um. I jus thought I'd warn you of something. We're pretty much right outside this wedding reception of yours."

"What! Go back!"

"We _can't._ This supposedly harmless cactus-"

"That's racist."

"Whatever! Anyway, It freaked out on us, and it's determined to see you. It stole a fucking car!"

The door burst open, and someone screamed.

"Yeah…It's here."

Jack and Ianto advanced towards it almost simultaneously, and silence fell over the entire room, and they looked on with jaws hitting the floor.

"Um…hello," Jack gave it a one-hundred watt smile.

"I demand to talk to Captain Jack Harkness," The apparently male creature commanded.

Jack took his pass out and waved it in front of his face. "You're talking to him, honey. Lets get out of here. Sir, you're coming with us."

Jack took the creature by the arm, all but dragging him out. Ianto followed, after risking a final look at his family. "Okay," He said into his COMMS, "Get everyone in here Retconned. As fast as possible."

#*#*#

Shust as they shoved the creature into the back of the SUV, a call of, "Wait! Stop!" came from someone running out of the building. It was Rhiannon.

Freezing upon seeing the SUV, her jaw dropped. "I-Ianto?"

"Hi, Rhi," He muttered, leaning against the hood whilst Owen, Jack and Gwen surveyed the cactus-like creature.

"Torchwood. You work for bloody _Torchwood_, Ianto!"

"Who's this?" Owen asked, looking up.

Ianto sighed. "This is Rhiannon. My sister. Rhiannon, this is Owen and Gwen, they're two colleagues of mine-"

"Sorry to interrupt, baby," Jack cut in, pulling on his army coat, "We better clear this up at the Hub. Rhiannon, you coming?"

Ianto opened his mouth to protest, but Jack put his hands on the Welshman's hips, standing close eough to make Owen role his eyes. "Trust me baby. It's about time you stopped living in complete secrecy. Owen, can you slip Retcon to everyone in that room? Is that possible?"

"Already on it."


	10. Lean On Me

**[A/N- Thank you so much for reading this far, and if you've been reading since the beginning of this fic I salute you! I hope you enjoyed it.]**

"Welcome to Torchwood three, Rhiannon," Jack announced, running his hand lovingly over the walkway barrier.

"My god…this place is amazing…" She looked up at the ceiling, her eyes widening as Myfawny flew over her. "Is that..?"

"Yeah," said Ianto, steepping forward, "That's a real pterodactyl. Her name is Myfawny," Jack took his hand, "Jack pretty much only let me into Torchwood because I helped catch her."

"Hmm…"Jack pecked his cheek, "And he was pretty good at handling a weevil attack. But wasn't the night we caught Myfawny the night of oour first almost-kiss, Mr Jones?" He rested his hands on Ianto's hips, looking into his eyes, and kissing him firmly on the mouth.

"I believe it was, Captain Harkness," Ianto murmured back.

They heard Rhiannon laugh, "Are they always like this?"

"What?" Owen asked, walking up to the computer screens, "They weren't like this all week?"

Rhiannon shook her head. "No…We didn't find out about them until last night."

"Oh…god." Owen sighed, deeply. "They've been with Ianto's family, meaning they'll be sex-deprived, touch deprived…you know, I'm betting you," He pointed at Gwen, "Twenty quid they'll be all over eachother at work tomorrow."

Rhiannon wrinkled her nose up. "Do they really do that?"

"Oh, yeah. Believe me, I've seen more of your brother than is right."

Gwen shuddered, "We've all walked in on them. Me, twice, Owen, four times…" Toshiko walked in, with a cup of coffee in hand, "Tosh, how many times have you walked in on Jack and Ianto now?"

Cringing, Toshiko spoke, "Approaching seven."

"They...have sex at work? Does your boss know?"

Owen sighed. "Jack _is_ the boss. They really did tell you nothing, didn't they?"

Ianto rolled his eyes, "My family didn't even know I'm into guys, I doubt they'd be very impressed if they knew I wwas shagging my hundreds-of-years-old boss."

Jack looked around to see that Rhiannon was looking at him quizzically. "Oh yeah," He said, "Don't be fooled by my good looks. Owen, how much of their memories did you wipe?"

Owen looked up, "I gave them enough retcon each to wipe twenty minutes. I only gave the kids sedative, I doubt anyone would believe them if they went on about that cactu-"

"I told you, Owen," Jack interrupted, "That's racist!"

"Oh, so you are listening? You aren't too busy…" He pulled a face, trailing off.

Jack smirked, but walked up to the computer desks and put his arm around Tosh. "Anyway, Tosh, this is Rhiannon, Ianto's sister. Rhiannon, meet Toshiko Sato, our resident computer _genius._"

Tosh blushed, her fce illuminated by the light of the computer screen as she typed. "He's only saying that. It's nice to meet you, Rhiannon. I'd come down and shake your hand but I'm really busy."

Rhiannon smiled, and for a moment everything was cakm. Until Ianto's phone rang.

He sighed as he checked the caller ID. "It's mam, Rhi."

She shrugged, "Answer it."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. What's the worst that could happen?"

He scoffed. "You're not the one who's gay." He answered the call, turning hiss back on everyone else in the room. "Hey, Mam."

Jack laughed as Ianto winced and held the phone away from his ear. "Yep…yep, that was Jack…No I did _not_ 'run away from the reception' to 'be inappropriate' with him…"

Owen covered his mouth, sniggering.

"For gods sake, mam! Work called. I needed to go in. Yes, I did see the bridesmaids. No that didn't make me change my mind about Jack, you may have noticed that they're not exactly my type…I'm not _sassing you_…"Tosh pursed her lips, trying not to laugh. Jack ssnatched the phone from him.

"Sorry, Mrs Jones, but Ianto's gotta go." He hung up, and turned to see Ianto staring at him wide-eyed.

"You have no idea whaat you've just done."

"_Relax_, baby. I'm good at winning people over. You of all people should know that."

"Yeah, but you can't flirt and sleep with my mother."

"I've done worse." He winked at him, and the room erupted into laughter.

#*#*#

Jack put his suitcase in the back of Ianto's car whilst his boyfriend said his goodbyes to his mother and father. Mrs Jones still had a stern expression on her face when she looked at Jack, but she no longer commented on them negatively.

"You really must visit more, Ianto, darling," Jack heard her say, "How about at Christmas?"

"I'll see if I can get time off, Mam."

"You'd better! Mica and little David missed you so much. They seem fond of Jack as well. But it would be nice to see you without the fuss of having a wedding to prepare for."

"Alright then. Well, I suppose we'd better be off."

Jack shut the boot of the car. "Goodbye, then. Mr Jones, Mrs Jones."

#*#*#

Owen stretched out, reviewing what he had written on an autopsy report, chewing on his pen. Tosh stood at a computer, drinking coffee, and Gwen was checking the rift-activity scans.

The noisy alarm signalled Ianto and Jack entering the Hub, and he looked up at them. Gwen went through the necessary greetings and niceties with them, but as soon as that was over, the couple departed to Jack's office.

Owen stood up, looking a his watch. "And…ten, nine, eight, seven,six, five, four , three, two-"

They all winced in unison at the sounds travelling down from upstairs.

"Like I said, ten seconds. Or thereabout, but…the details don't count. You two owe me twenty quid each."

_~Fin~_

**So, that's the end! Anyone who reviewed has my eternal gratitude, as does anyone who favourite or followed. I love you guys so, so much, and I might consider a sequel, but I'm unsure.**

**Thank you once more!**

_**Song Titles Used:**_

_**Me and Mrs Jones / Billy Paul**_

_**I Don't Like Mondays / The Boomtown Rats**_

_**Highway To Hell / AC/DC**_

_**American Pie / Don McClean**_

_**Wish You Were Here / Pink Flloyd**_

_**The Way It Is /Bruce Hornsby**_

_**Mr. Blue Sky / Electric Light Orchestra**_

_**True / Spandau Ballet**_

_**Rebel Yell / Billy Idol**_

_**Behind Blue Eyes / The Who**_

_**Lean On Me / Bill Withers**_


End file.
